What it takes. The journey, the goal... to Let God.

Our Lord is like the dentists. . . . 

Dozens of people go to Him to be cured 

of some one particular sin which they are ashamed of. . . . 

Well, He will cure it all right: but He will not stop there. 

That may be all you asked; 

but if you once call Him in, He will give you the full treatment. . . . 

“Make no mistake,” He says, “if you let Me, I will make you perfect. The moment you put yourself in My hands, that is what you are in for. Nothing less, or other, than that. You have free will, and if you choose, you can push Me away. But if you do not push Me away, understand that I am going to see this job through. Whatever suffering it may cost you in your earthly life, whatever inconceivable purification it may cost you after death, whatever it costs Me, 

I will never rest, nor let you rest, until you are literally perfect—

until my Father can say without reservation that He is well pleased with you, as He said he was well pleased with Me. This I can do and will do. But I will not do anything less.”

. . . You must realize from the outset that the goal 

toward which He is beginning to guide you 

is absolute perfection; and 

no power in the whole universe, except you yourself, can prevent Him from taking you to that goal. 

That is what you are in for. 

And it is very important to realize that.

(C. S. Lewis, The Joyful Christian, 77-78; emphasis added.)

It's up to you. What do you say? Heh. 

I say...  Keep bringing it on.

The loyal camel

I have heard it told that camels, although rather temperamental creatures (spitting, jumping, etc.), are in reality quite loyal to their masters. They will allow their master to place a load of burdens on their back and walk with them for miles and miles. At the end of the day, the camel will kneel down and then allow the master to unload the burdens for the night. The master will then inspect the camel for worn, red or swollen spots so he can adjust the load the next day so as to not harm the camel so it can continue the journey, pack in tow.

The analogy and challenge issued with this little tale, is to kneel down at night and allow God to take my burdens of the day, for the night. Trusting that in the morning, I will be ready to take them again and continue my journey. Trusting that He will adjust the load in a way I can manage and handle. No need to carry the burdens alone. No need to let them drag you down or wear you out. Loyal to the master and allowing Him to take care of me when He gives me a few loads to carry each day, walking with Him each day.

Shedding the Shackles

"That Particular Time"

my foundation was rocked my tried and true way to deal was to vanish
my departures were old I stood in the room shaking in my boots
at that particular time love had challenged me to stay
at that particular moment I knew not run away again
that particular month I was ready to investigate with you
at that particular time

we thought a break would be good for four months we sat and vacillated
we thought a small time apart would clear up the doubts that were abounding
at that particular time love encouraged me to wait
at that particular moment it helped me to be patient
that particular month we needed time to marinate in what "us" meant

I've always wanted for you what you've wanted for yourself
and yet I wanted to save us high water or hell
and I kept on ignoring the ambivalence you felt
and in the meantime I lost myself
in the meantime I lost myself
I'm sorry I lost myself. I am

you knew you needed more time time spent alone with no distraction
you felt you needed to fly solo and high to define what you wanted
at that particular time love encouraged me to leave
at that particular moment I knew staying with you meant deserting me
that particular month was harder than you'd believe but I still left
at that particular time

Walking on Water

When I started this blog, I used the scripture in Matthew about Christ walking on water. At the time, I was waiting for Him to come walking across the stormy sea of my life, to reach out and rescue me, just like He did for Peter. I thought my 'fourth watch' had come, but He knew better. My fourth watch didn't come until last year; two years later. He DID come and I was sinking fast. A month or so ago, someone was relating this story about Peter walking on water in sacrament meeting. I've always loved this story because it was very reassuring that when the storms of life have begun to take over, I can reach out to Christ and He will extend His hand to me and pull me back up; save me from sinking. That Sunday when I heard the story, something clicked inside me. It occurred to me that Christ intended for Peter to WALK. ON. WATER. He intends for ME to walk on water. For all of us to walk on water. Sure, He's there to reach out and save us if/when we start to sink, but if we do, we get the same chastisement as Peter, 'O, ye of little faith'. I have always focused so much on the importance of reaching out for help when in need (an excellent lesson to learn) that I forgot that Peter's lack of faith is what got him there in the first place. He could have done it. He let fear enter his heart. Peter's FIRST lesson to me is to not do what he did, which is to let fear cast out his faith. Christ wants me to have the kind of faith it takes to walk on water. That's what he expects of me. That's what I am now trying to do each day. I'm walking on water folks, across the smooth glassy water of calm days and when the storms blow up and it seem like they want to knock me down, under the crashing waves. I like this picture because He is walking across the water, through the stormy sea... calmly showing me it CAN be done. Not walking away or toward me... simply showing me what He expects of me and where He expects me to go. He expects me to have the faith to walk through any tempest that may rage. And He will lead me through... all the way through until I arrive on the correct side of through. Closer to Him. I no longer think of this story as inspiration to reach out when I'm sinking. It has become inspiration to never hear the words, 'O, ye of little faith'. So I will keep my eyes on Him and keep walking, especially when the seas of life are rough. 'Well done' is what I want to hear and, I suspect it is what Christ would rather say to me or anyone. I am grateful to Peter for both lessons his life experience has taught me. Lesson 2 has kept me reaching out to the Savior when I am sinking. Let's face it, we all have days we feel like we are sinking. It's a lesson I will always remember. However, I have skipped over the first lesson for too long. Time to get out of boat... in fact, I've enthusiastically jumped out of the boat, come what may, and walking on water is exactly what I intend to do, in all I do.

The picture is by Julius Von Klever, it was painted in 1890. A giclee of this painting now hangs in my office. I see it 5 days a week, 9 hours a day... reminding me that I am supposed to follow Him, right across the stormy seas of life. He knows I can... He wants me to... I want to... walk on water. It's a choice. I can do this. After all, With God all things are possible.

He will not force us.

“God is serious about his commitment to free agency,

and without this there would be no joy or life at all.

We worship a God

whose character is so stunning,

and who wants us to come home,

but he will not force us.

He will give us the maximum reward for our acts

and impose upon us the minimum penalty

which it is possible for him to impose.”

Neal A. Maxwell

God, please help Me, help me

Observation 1) God to you: take care of... (fill in the blank) = added ability to do that thing you were asked to do.
Observation 2) God to you: take care of yourself = less added ability until you've had a chance to mess it up big time & learned a lesson.

Conclusion: 1) God wants you to succeed when helping others. 2) God wants you to progress when helping yourself.

Solution: Happiness really does come from helping others.

OR I spend way too much time asking God for help when it comes to helping others and not enough time asking for help when it comes to me.

I don't know if this is right or not. I spend a lot of time cycling through observation 2. Bleh.

It's so hard to see the forest for the trees. I need to hire a helicopter or learn how to fly. Oh, now I see. Yes, yes I do. Someday I may tell you too.

Really, when it all boils down to it, its all the same - its in the doing that is the hard thing & that's when the learning happens. Darn it.

OK, OK, you twisted my arm, I'll tell you. Let's say I'm praying about someone (not me) & God reveals to me, "they need to hear someone (YOU) tell them..." So I think about how hard it will be to tell them ... but I know I must because I know God has revealed it. (if this has never happened to you then try asking. All I know is its what I got when I began asking exactly how can I better follow the Holy Ghost and help those around me) Any way. I do what I know I should do, even though it was hard and I feel great. I wonder if they will do what they are supposed to do, but that is not my concern. At that point, I have done what I was supposed to do & now it is in their court to act on or not. = success for me. Now let's say I am praying about me & what I need. God reaveals to me "do..." Well, ... is hard, not only is it hard, it seems impossible and when I've tried ... I have not done so well at it. Why why why is it so hard to DO something for me I know I should do? Well, I have gained empathy for why others don't DO what they should do... Silver lining = I AM learning, even if I'm still working on the DOING.

"Do it" President Spencer W. Kimball
So much said in so few words.

So ask yourself - what is it God wants you to DO, for you? for others?

One time my mom told me this is a gospel of action. There's no sitting on the sidelines. Once again, she was right.

He Knows

"For Jesus knew from the beginning who they were"

A verse of scripture can stand alone or have meaning in context. The meanings are different to me and I like them both.

St. John Chapter 6

61 When Jesus knew in himself that his disciples murmured at it, he said unto them, Doth this offend you?

62 What and if ye shall see the Son of man ascend up where he was before?

63 It is the spirit that quickeneth; the flesh profiteth nothing: the words that I speak unto you, they are spirit, and they are life.

64 But there are some of you that believe not. For Jesus knew from the beginning who they were that believed not, and who should betray him.

65 And he said, Therefore said I unto you, that no man can come unto me, except it were given unto him of my Father.

66 ¶ From that time many of his disciples went back, and walked no more with him.

67 Then said Jesus unto the twelve, Will ye also go away?

68 Then Simon Peter answered him, Lord, to whom shall we go? thou hast the words of eternal life.

69 And we believe and are sure that thou art that Christ, the Son of the living God.

I like that he knows. I like it that there is nothing for me to hide. At first it is a little scary. I tense up at the thought trying to figure out how to push the things I wish I could hide into the background and emphasize all of the good instead. Then I realize that Christ is the perfect friend. How many times have I wished for a friend who really knows me and really cares for me in spite of who I am. Then I relax. I don't have to hide anything. Together, my perfect friend & I can look at me and who I am. Its always a relief to have my faults & my short comings addressed in a matter of fact way. Yep, there they are. I'm not proud of them. I'm a work in progress. Once I get out of 'Jonah mode' its a lot easier to ask for help & because I know he is my perfect friend, I know he will patiently work with me. I just have to keep trying to improve, get better, do better. One step (stumble) at a time. Keep walking with him, keep believing, keep hoping, keep trusting, keep repenting, keep learning. This scripture doesn't leave me with the sense that he is frustrated, mad, giving up or anything confrontational or forced. Just a very matter of fact statement of how things are. Statements of truth, not conjecture. Giving the opportunity for each to choose what and who they will be... a delicate balance of agency and an offer of better things. It really is an amazing plan. Without Christ we can do nothing for ourselves as far as salvation goes. With Christ, we must do all we can to work out our own salvation so it is something we choose, not something that was forced upon us. His sacrifice gives me something to work for, something worth fighting for. Something within my ability to attain because he makes up the shortcomings I can not overcome. Wow. When I think about it, all I can say is, Wow.

Personal Revelation

On Sunday I attended the Ochre Mountain Temple dedication. It was great. I didn't take notes, but I did feel that my heart was open to the influence of the spirit. I felt impressed during the dedication to start a blog that is primarily of a spiritual nature. That's the thing I really love about personal revelation. None of the speakers said, 'go start a blog of spiritual things'. Their words and the music did invite the spirit to be there and I did feel that and as I opened my heart and mind to it, God was able to speak to me. Him to me. No one else heard it, no one else knew, no one would know if I did not act on it. Well, no one but God & me. The point is, this is one of those times when I am using my agency to act on personal revelation. I'm pretty sure there would be no negative consequences if I did not do this - but maybe, just maybe something good will come of it if I do. It's a leap of faith. It always is for me.